http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com http://blogcopy.com http://blogcopy.com/int/fpix.php?bd=1vbg en-us Thu, 20 Jun 2013 00:44:34 +0000 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqjbi6 Wed, 19 Jun 2013 19:53:05 +0000
The power of the mind to change our perception of ourselves has always fascinated me.  Since I've been writing seriously, about a decade now, I've become even more interested in the subconscious mind and all the ouija board-like promises of creativity, focus, productivity, self-esteem and happiness if we could just control our subconscious.



Here are a few facts.  The subconscious mind:
Does not judge what you tell it, only takes all information as fact.
Can not tell the difference between true and false.
Works 24hours a day.
Takes everything literally.
Never says no.
Only recognizes the present.
Can be seen as the source of night dreams and automatic thoughts.
Is a repository for every thought, every visual, every emotion, every incident that has ever occurred in your lifetime.
Over the last ten years I've tried many techniques.  Unfortunately, my biggest problems weren't with the techniques or the information, but with consistency and patience.  What do you mean I have to do it everyday?  What do you mean I have to do it for months to see the result?  Therefore, I didn't get the results I sought and picked up the beliefs of so many others--it's hype to sell books, fill seminar seats, in essence, pad pockets.

But aging has it's benefits.  As does experience.  In the last year or two I've become more patient, more open-minded and more determined (could be translated into desperate, depending on the day) to crack that shell keeping my subconscious out of reach.

And as I've studied the conscious and unconscious mind through the eyes of knowledgeable professionals and tried various techniques created by experienced and renowned researchers, I've seen the benefits and know there are so many more to be cultivated with time, effort, knowledge and experience.  

What I've learned has been worth the wait and there is so much more to discover.  During the month of February, we'll explore the potential benefits and powers of the subconscious mind including topics such as self-talk, affirmations, positivity and some even "further out" (or what my critique partner calls "woo-woo") techniques, such as meditation, hypnotherapy and even tarot.

These topics will directly relate to writing, such as how they've helped me and/or how they could be used in other ways, but each technique could be applied to benefit any aspect of our lives.

I hope you'll come back and join me on this path to understanding and utilizing the power of the subconscious mind to urge us toward achieving our ultimate best and welcome your comments and experience regarding the subconscious and how it has affected your personal and professional growth.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqjbi6 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=46ys4vr Wed, 19 Jun 2013 19:51:27 +0000
That talk can be good or bad.  It can support our goals and drive us to achieve or it can gut our drive to even try.  We often aren't aware of what we're actually saying to ourselves.  By neglecting to notice our negative self-talk we may be permitting a continual flow of worry and self-criticism.  But by recognizing the power of positive self-talk, we have the potential to bring about positive change in our lives.

I've struggled with the whole glass half full-glass half empty concept for decades.  I'd venture to say a lot of us have or still do.  The truth is, our outlook -- pessimistic vs. optimistic (I also believe there is a state in between I call realistic) developed long before we had a choice. 

From the day we're born, every word, every thought, every action became imprints placed on our subconscious by others.  Later on, in childhood, adolescence and young adulthood our own words, thoughts and images of how we view ourselves create a lasting impression in our subconscious--those concepts largely a product of how we were raised.

If your young years were filled with positivity, support, unconditional love and accolades at every turn -- you've got a head start.  If you experienced more punishment than praise, more cynicism than support or more criticism than kudos -- you have a little harder road to walk. 

Either way, as adults we have to create our own lives, and with the stresses and responsibilities of everyday life...the truth is...its rough.  If you're a writer (by definition a tad more sensitive than the general population), the roller coaster ride toward publication, or even just attempting to express yourself competently, can take a toll on even the rosiest outlook.

The good news: no matter how positive or negative our early years, what successes or failures we've experienced, how many trophies or trials we've collected, we can all end up in the same place in our individual lives--one of achievement, comfort, contentment and positivity to the level of our own personal best.

The power is in cultivating our subconscious mind.  (No voo-doo involved.  Promise.)

I believe my success with positive self-talk is a result of a combination of techniques.  In the working form, positive self-talk is really a combination of self-talk, affirmations and the law of attraction.
Self-talk: thoughts regarding ourselves that pass through our mind.
Affirmations: a carefully formatted, positive statement that is repeated to one's self.
Law of Attraction: A theory that states "like attracts like" and your dominant thoughts will find a way to manifest, good or bad. 
That said, we all know simply repeating, "I am happy." "I am happy." "I am happy." will most likely lead to a hair-pulling event during which the affirmation slips into something more like, "I'm happy, dammit!"  "Look how frigging happy I am!"  "I'm as happy as a cricket in a freaking frogs belly for God's sake!"  

So, here are a few tips that took my self-talk from mindless repetition to meaningful statements and turned my brain and my perspective around:

Visualize
We all know how to daydream.  That's all visualization is--a daydream.  So, when you decide on the powerful self-talk statements, visualize that statement. 
Let's say your statement is:  I am patient and flexible.  What would it look like to be patient?  Imagine yourself in a line at the store, relaxed, observing the surroundings, maybe chatting with the person ahead or behind you, with no one waiting on you, no where you have to be.  Imagine you have all the time in the world and waiting another minute or two won't affect your life one way or the other.
Let's say your statement is:  My daughter and I have a close relationship.  We are open and honest with each other.  What would it look like to be more in touch with your daughter?  Visualize yourself picking her up from school, relaxed, looking forward to seeing her.  Imagine listening, open and accepting, as she talks about her day.  See yourself being the empathetic positive influence you want to be. 
Imagine being your statement.  Being exactly what you want in your life.

Feel it
If you were to feel the patience in the first example above, what emotions would you feel?  What physical sensations would your body experience?
While you visualize yourself waiting in line, maybe the tension drifts out of your shoulders.  The muscles of your jaw relax.  Your stance eases. 
Because you're not focused on how slow the line is moving, how that cashier should really think about retirement, how you have so much to do somewhere else, you notice that the woman in front of you is wearing the most beautiful scarf you've ever seen.  
Maybe you comment on it and make a new acquaintance.  Maybe you just enjoy the pattern and color.  Maybe it even gives you a new idea for a character you're writing or a project you're working on.  Maybe it simply makes you happy. 
That's the great thing about day dreams -- they're all yours!  

Live it
Be the person in your visualization, and apply it to your every day life.  If you are the person with the open, warm relationship with your daughter (which you are--your self-talk confirms it), how would you go through your day?
Your openness would extend to others.  That acceptance and warmth would transform the relationships you have.  You would be more confident.  You would have closer connections throughout your life.  You would be a good listener, empathetic, warm.  You would be happier. 
Living what you tell yourself you are, creates the very life you want.

Infuse Gratitude
Gratitude in itself is a life-changing force.  The subject deserves a month of posts unto itself.  But I found this concept both a powerful catalyst for moving my self-talk and visualizations forward and a motivating force to continue the self-talk even on a bad day.

When you say to yourself: I am patient and flexible, you follow that self-talk with the sensation of gratitude.  Infusing gratitude into your self-talk often empowers me.  Often it even makes me smile...or laugh.
Traffic--there is test of patience.  How about: I am so glad I'm patient and flexible, because that means I'm not an asshole like the guy who just cut me off.  Or: I'm grateful my patience keeps me from stressing like that guy who just cut me off.  Man, it would suck to be him.
And what about your relationship with your daughter? 
Try something like: I'm so lucky to have this awesome relationship with my daughter.  Or: I'm so fortunate to have this gift in my life.
I'll be back next Tuesday with lots of examples of positive self-talk for every area of your life and how to create your own.

In the mean time, if you're interested in learning more about this topic, an excellent book is The Self-Talk Solution by Shad Helmstetter.

Can you share your experiences with self-talk, affirmations or the law of attraction?





Posted by
Joan Swan






















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Writing]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=46ys4vr http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=46ys2xr Wed, 19 Jun 2013 19:36:06 +0000
I'm making progress.
I can handle this.
I'm willing to try.
I am in control of this.
I am excellent at ... writing/singing/problem solving
I have a fantastic ... mind/talent/ability with people
I keep trying.
I'll get it.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=46ys2xr http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqj92o Wed, 19 Jun 2013 19:33:54 +0000 our mind.
Affirmations: a carefully formatted,
positive statement that is repeated to one's self.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqj92o http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=39vztjw Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:20:47 +0000 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=39vztjw http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=z71xrd Tue, 18 Jun 2013 21:24:05 +0000
I'm making progress.
I can handle this.
I'm willing to try.
I am in control of this.
I am excellent at ... writing/singing/problem solving
I have a fantastic ... mind/talent/ability with people
I keep trying.
I'll get it.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=z71xrd http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=z71xov Tue, 18 Jun 2013 21:23:42 +0000
Nothing ever goes right.  (a.k.a. Could just one thing go right?)
I'm no good at ... (fill in the blank)  (a.k.a. I'm not that
creative/smart/ambitious)
Why should I try?  It won't work out anyway.
I can't get caught up.  (I don't have enough time. This is too much
work.)
I've tried, I can't. 
What is wrong with me today?  (a.k.a. Why isn't my mind working?)
It's just not my day.
I'm so tired.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=z71xov http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqc2j6 Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:11:41 +0000 I'm making progress.
I can handle this.
I'm willing to try.
I am in control of this.
I am excellent at ... writing/singing/problem solving
I have a fantastic ... mind/talent/ability with people
I keep trying.
I'll get it.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqc2j6 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct30cj Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:11:15 +0000 Nothing ever goes right.  (a.k.a. Could just one thing go right?)
I'm no good at ... (fill in the blank)  (a.k.a. I'm not that creative/smart/ambitious)
Why should I try?  It won't work out anyway.
I can't get caught up.  (I don't have enough time. This is too much work.)
I've tried, I can't. 
What is wrong with me today?  (a.k.a. Why isn't my mind working?)
It's just not my day.
I'm so tired.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct30cj http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=z6ylhd Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:10:38 +0000 Self-talk affects the subconscious mind.  It is the type of talk that chatters constantly in the back of our minds without specific, conscious thought.  Things we think, but don't say.  Things we tell ourselves about ourselves or about our job or our life, but don't rationalize or justify before we say them.
The subconscious mind is programmed similarly to the way a computer is programmed, so like a computer the subconscious mind will only perform the tasks it is programmed to perform.
Information presented to the subconscious mind causes both a psychological and a physiological response.
The subconscious mind does not hold any biases or beliefs other than those that have already been programmed in.
The brain records exactly what it receives without regard to where it comes from or how it get the information.  The brain doesn't care whether the information is true or false, right or wrong.
The programming you accept from others and the conscious and unconscious directives, pictures, feelings and thoughts that you transmit to yourself in your own control center of the brain--the subconscious mind.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=z6ylhd http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2tcgh6l Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:09:58 +0000 Does not judge what you tell it, only takes all information as fact.
Can not tell the difference between true and false.
Works 24hours a day.
Takes everything literally.
Never says no.
Only recognizes the present.
Can be seen as the source of night dreams and automatic thoughts.
Is a repository for every thought, every visual, every emotion, every incident that has ever occurred in your lifetime.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2tcgh6l http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1w9pj38 Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:07:11 +0000 Because even multi-published
authors fear this with every book.

I am never afraid to try. I enjoy staying with it and moving
forward.
I give myself freedom to fail and reap the success those attempts have
brought me.
I prepare myself with the knowledge and skill I need to
succeed.Getting more
done: Because we writers are
consummate procrastinators.

I place great value on taking action. I see what
needs to be done and I do it.
Both the quality and the quantity of what I
do (my writing) is important
to me. The rewards I achieve are worth the investment I make.
I look forward each day to increasing my effectiveness (word count) and accomplishing
more. Perseverance (and
hope): Because no author would
succeed without it.

I have faith, I have courage, I have belief--in myself and my writing.
Each day I have more hope and conviction in my ability to solve any problem (craft a novel worthy of the bestsellers
list).
I never give up.  I am a winner, and I give myself the energy and
belief to come out on top (of the bestsellers
list).Dealing with
problems: Because in the publishing
industry, there is no avoiding them.

I like challenges and meet them head
on.
My will, my strength, my determination are always stronger than any problem
I face.
I know every problem holds within itself the keys to its own
solution.Speaking and Writing
with Confidence: Self-explanatory.

I have good ideas and I am able to express my ideas in a clear and
interesting way.  (I'm a killer
storyteller.)
People like the way I express myself, and they enjoy hearing my thoughts and
ideas. (People love my writing and enjoy
reading my novels).
My mind gives me the words I need, right when I need
them.Positive
risk-taking: Because every new
character, new plot, new story is a risk.

To me, a good risk is a bridge to my success and a doorway to greater
opportunity (the next
contract).
I am willing to accept those risks which are necessary for the fulfillment
of my goals.
Any risk I accept is a healthy new force in my life.  A challenge and
worthwhile goal.  Another win in the making.
I have the courage to do what I need to
do (write on the edge) to
get where I want to go (to the best
seller's list).Improving your career: Because if you stagnate in the publishing sea, you get
eaten by sharks.

I enjoy seeking and finding new opportunities in
my life (publishing).
I never allow the word "no" to stop me or even slow me down.
I look forward and never look back.
I am creating a bright, positive, successful future for myself.
I know where I'm going (I will be a bestseller), and I'm well on
my way.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1w9pj38 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct2zq1 Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:04:18 +0000 I can handle this.
I'm willing to try.
I am in control of this.
I am excellent at ... writing/singing/problem solving
I have a fantastic ... mind/talent/ability with people
I keep trying.
I'll get it.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct2zq1 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqbopo Tue, 18 Jun 2013 00:36:56 +0000 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=1fqbopo http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=3qf71bg Tue, 18 Jun 2013 00:36:34 +0000 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=3qf71bg http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct1s6j Mon, 17 Jun 2013 19:41:58 +0000
Nothing ever goes right.  (a.k.a. Could just one thing go right?)
I'm no good at ... (fill in the blank)  (a.k.a. I'm not that
creative/smart/ambitious)
Why should I try?  It won't work out anyway.
I can't get caught up.  (I don't have enough time. This is too much
work.)
I've tried, I can't. 
What is wrong with me today?  (a.k.a. Why isn't my mind working?)
It's just not my day.
I'm so tired.I've been guilty of just about every one of these in
one form or another -- for the better part of my life.  Hence, my generally
negative/pessimistic personality for the majority of my years.Now, I
consciously make the effort to change my thoughts around by restructuring my
sentences.  Mini personal
story:  At my work, there is one particular doctor who is
incredibly challenging to work with.  My self-esteem always seemed to take
a hit after a shift with her.  I developed my own "mantra" for self-talk
repetition whenever we worked together.  I am enough. I do enough. I know
enough.  This short, quick, easy little string of words
greatly enhanced my working experience with her and reduced the stress during
those days.Things TO say:

I'm making progress.
I can handle this.
I'm willing to try.
I am in control of this.
I am excellent at ... writing/singing/problem solving
I have a fantastic ... mind/talent/ability with people
I keep trying.
I'll get it]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct1s6j http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct14d1 Mon, 17 Jun 2013 16:38:32 +0000 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2ct14d1 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=46yiz5r Mon, 17 Jun 2013 16:33:51 +0000 Nothing ever goes right.  (a.k.a. Could just one thing go right?)
I'm no good at ... (fill in the blank)  (a.k.a. I'm not that creative/smart/ambitious)
Why should I try?  It won't work out anyway.
I can't get caught up.  (I don't have enough time. This is too much work.)
I've tried, I can't. 
What is wrong with me today?  (a.k.a. Why isn't my mind working?)
It's just not my day.
I'm so tired.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=46yiz5r http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=3qf4btg Mon, 17 Jun 2013 10:41:02 +0000 http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=3qf4btg http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=39vid7w Sat, 15 Jun 2013 04:26:48 +0000 I can handle this.
I'm willing to try.
I am in control of this.
I am excellent at ... writing/singing/problem solving
I have a fantastic ... mind/talent/ability with people
I keep trying.
I'll get it.]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=39vid7w http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2csqxu1 Fri, 14 Jun 2013 23:59:03 +0000 face]]> http://blogcopy.com/~joanswan.blogspot.com?copy=2csqxu1